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Parent's Day Panic

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12 Apr 2022 00:01 #1601 by DanZilla
Parent's Day Panic was created by DanZilla
This new story by Wasamon is available... please read and leave your commentary.

Parent's Day Panic
The following user(s) said Thank You: Dan Formerly Domoviye, Mister D

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12 Apr 2022 07:08 #1602 by Wasamon
Replied by Wasamon on topic Parent's Day Panic
With all due apologies to anyone who comes into this one blind or not up to date on literally everything I've written for the WU previously...

>_>;
The following user(s) said Thank You: Dan Formerly Domoviye

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12 Apr 2022 07:09 #1603 by Dan Formerly Domoviye

With all due apologies to anyone who comes into this one blind or not up to date on literally everything I've written for the WU previously...

>_>;

Thanks. This got me laughing, after a long day caring for a child who has the flu.

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12 Apr 2022 07:11 #1604 by Wasamon
Replied by Wasamon on topic Parent's Day Panic
I aim to please :)

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12 Apr 2022 08:50 #1605 by Dreamer
Replied by Dreamer on topic Parent's Day Panic
SPOILER ALERT
Below is a stream of conscious commentary I type up as I read the story. There will be details from the story included in it. If you have not read the story yet and don't wish to have details of it spoiled, read no further.

Parent's Day Panic comments
Warning: Spoiler!

Thank You for the story comments appreciated and help me know they are being read and liked. :-) Note: My story comments can't nor are trying to replace reading the stories, simply my way of enjoying them and letting the authors know I enjoy them.
The following user(s) said Thank You: null0trooper, Dan Formerly Domoviye

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12 Apr 2022 20:16 - 12 Apr 2022 20:33 #1606 by Dan Formerly Domoviye
Thanks Dreamer.
I'm surprised you got the commentary written that quickly. Excellent work.
I'm just going to respond to the parts that involve my writing and characters, Shisa and Day Dreamer.

Warning: Spoiler!


That was a lot more than I'd planned on writing.
Once again, thanks for the comments.
Last edit: 12 Apr 2022 20:33 by Dan Formerly Domoviye.
The following user(s) said Thank You: Dreamer, mhalpern

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13 Apr 2022 02:38 #1607 by mhalpern
Replied by mhalpern on topic Parent's Day Panic
You know I wonder if Sterling's power works on high level exemplars (5 or higher) mental package, who have a hard time failing a "perception check" as it were. Would be good to have someone on staff to help her, perhaps related to one of the tech track teachers, with a BIT that makes her look far younger than she is...

Micro scenes and bad ideas are freely adoptable
The following user(s) said Thank You: Dreamer

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14 Apr 2022 08:45 #1612 by Valentine
Replied by Valentine on topic Parent's Day Panic
While I love these stories that are more slice of life, I think this one should have been broken down into a couple of stories. The constant jumping from POV to other POV made it difficult at times to track exactly whom the side characters are, and the relationship to the POV at times.

I really did enjoy the stories, I just need to make up a scorecard to track who is who.

You know I wonder if Sterling's power works on high level exemplars (5 or higher) mental package, who have a hard time failing a "perception check" as it were. Would be good to have someone on staff to help her, perhaps related to one of the tech track teachers, with a BIT that makes her look far younger than she is...

I wonder how Jade and/or the J-Team would perceive her. Or any of the magic aura seeing people.

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