- The Classrooms - Story Feedback
- Kirby Hall - The Second Generation
- Turkey Day Tragedy by Wasamon
Turkey Day Tragedy by Wasamon
For the record, and I might as well say this now, but the target reactions for each part of this story are:
Part 1: What the heck?
Part 2: Oh, hell.
Part 3: JESUS F*&^!ING CHRIST!!
Part 4: Well, damn.
Good to know I'm on target with Part 3
Below is a stream of conscious commentary I type up as I read the story. There will be details from the story included in it. If you have not read the story yet and don't wish to have details of it spoiled, read no further.
Turkey Day Tragedy Part 4 comments
Never think someone you cared for was a delusion, always search for evidence to prove otherwise. Good thing Tanya has the help of her friends, Caro already has an idea. Avzel Goran, now that is a unique name. No, the loss of memory or remembering Sterling has nothing to do with being or not being an avatar with a strong spirit, I hope Scarlyt was sloppy and left more clues around.
Friday, November 25th, 2016
Good, Avsel, any details you remember can help on the trail to find Sterling. Ouch, Caro having trouble with coming up with a rhyme for a spell, still having issues since the ring incident, I bet. 2 weeks since that incident and she has been trying to figure out how to make it work without the big issue, no wonder, you have to rest and recharge or your creativity will not work for you as it should.
Leslie aka Ping, why does Vic have a nervous tic from mentioning one of her Gadgeteer specializations is electrical engineering? Ping, what have you been up to with the Whateley computer systems and cameras? Sera, always trying to Tanya to let you be her roommate. And Whirlibird has a big mouth. Tanya spells it out to Sera, but Sera just lashes out at her, she has serious issues with rejection and not realizing when someone has no interest in her that way. Elbowing Vic on purpose, she is falling right into the Amazons' hands all too easily.
Cinnamon roll on the floor and Vic picks it up and eats it, well, considering how clean the floors of the Crystal Hall probably are I would too. Oof, Tanya laughing like that, she is extremely stressed out. Vic hugs her, and laughter turns into sobs, Tanya is going to need a lot of counseling to help her after this is all over.
Great, spying on Tanya and her friends, now knows more people remember Sterling around than she previously suspected. Great, she has read up on Vic and knows about past incidents he was involved in, cautious villains are so hard to deal with. And plotting against them, but unsure what to do next, if she erases any more memories of Sterling from any more people she is making things worse for herself when finally caught.
Dang, to have that named after you. An app that allows you to track people at Whateley through the school's surveillance systems, is all kinds of illegal for students to have. Scarlet is stuck at Whateley for the holiday weekend and going to Berlin for Black Friday shopping, boy, she is braver than most.
The Streisand Effect, yes. Attempts to deflect or remove attention only called more attention.
*eyes turn red with fury* Stop thinking of Sterling that way, you know she has trauma, and exploiting it like that is pissing me off. Whoa, those thoughts from Scarlyt, a self-hating mutant who hates other mutants and thinks they are inherently bad, with a few exceptions like Donut, who broke her into thinking like this? She is dangerous and it is making me wish Fubar was still at Whateley or would show up and warn them about her soon.
Sterling picking up that scent, she doesn't realize she has been drugged or Scarlyt had done it to her. *sigh* This would be a sweet moment if it weren't for Scarlyt's manipulation of Sterling. Going to Berlin for Black Friday shopping, Scarlyt, you are nuts. Great, Jen manipulated the shuttle attendants, this could be a mess if anything happens while they are off campus.
A full half-hour, Tanya needed to get all her built-up emotions out. Vic does the detective work in his head, with his deductive abilities he could be a good detective when he grows up. Great, the stoners are their only lead, at least Vic knows Ernesto and can speak Spanish. Ouch, no wonder Sam gets stoned, internal radio dial and he picks up things like that, painful.
They remember Sterling, but not her name and they can actually make her out in the picture when it is brought to their attention she is there. Good, they know when the stoners last saw Sterling, every little detail helps.
An investigation to find a missing person, I'm so glad that Tanya has the group of friends she does to aid her. Crud, not Jamie Howe, why did it have to be her for the next lead? Darn, that is plausible, Jamie is nuts enough to want to study a mutant like Sterling.
Snow that soon after Thanksgiving, I keep forgetting how high in the mountains Whateley is. Avsel taking Cookie on a walk, aww. Cookie trying to track the scent of Sterling from the single hair strand, it is cute how he goes about it. Tracked to the external tunnel entrance for Whitman, leaving Tanya wondering why she didn't use any of the other underground entrances. Too bad the scent trail ends there.
Darn, the tunnels were too small for Cookie and the scent trail too weak to keep tracking it. Scarlyt goofed up taking that way into the tunnels with Sterling, it raised so many questions as to why. So much space to search, rats. Jamie's lab space is nearby. If we never have to see another character go down into the Tangle it will be too soon.
The workshop would drive normal physicists mad trying to figure it out. There are 20 different pictures of them kissing, cute how they both blush. Ah, a true scientist paradise. Lab 14 and Jamie is in as foul a mood as ever. *facepalms* I can't believe she asked that about Vic. How can she stand all that heat?
So when told there is someone else in the picture she can just barely tell Sterling is there, that is at least something. Nooo! Don't give her more details about Sterling's power or your basic immunity to it, this is bad. Great, this is why I fear for Tia's safety as long as Jamie is at Whateley.
Scarlyt having fun on her outing with Sterling, and now it is going to be harder to get Sterling back from her. No, Sterling, don't flirt with her like this. Even off campus and keeping tabs on Tanya and her friends, I wish Sterling would find out what Scarlyt is up to. Caro in her room at Whitman, you better not harm her later on, Scarlyt.
Avsel still taking Cookie for a 'walk' for 2 hours now, and Cookie doesn't like Scarlyt, he is a good judge of character, a good dog. You spied on them kissing, you need a lesson in how to treat others right. No, you aren't going to have 'fun times' in a department store dressing room with Sterling, not if you value your limbs being intact once Tanya finds out.
Tanya, you are trying to find Sterling and working with all the information you have, you have no reason to feel guilty. Pastel is there and has been filled in on the situation. We hope you won't need a Healer when you find Sterling, but it is better to have one and not need one than to not have one and need one.
Good excuse for why you know about the apartment blocks for rent, Vic. Not a boyfriend and definitely not someone you want her to remain in the clutches of for much longer as she is manipulated more and more. Hehe, fake ID, what teen with Caro's power wouldn't do that at least once. Dang, Caro outdid herself this time, everyone can see the picture of Sterling clearly.
Why the odd looks, I agree with Pastel.
"Wow, she's hot." Pastel blinked at the odd looks thrown her way. "What? It's the truth. The boyfriend theory sounds pretty possible now."
Ouch, can only make a tracking charm to find Sterling, and it will only work for Tanya and must be custom-made, Caro's magic does have its limits. Yay, a call from Ping.
And so the system does pick Sterling up, but it's as a mystery spot as described above, now that is a weird effect. $50 bucks for a blackout in one area lasting that long on the security system cameras, I know the school is neutral, but that isn't right.
"Yeah, it's been... well, Aster's been calling them lacunae, but she likes big words like that. Holes, basically. Times when the system thinks there might be, or should be, a person in view but then changes its mind."
I hate that this is how Whateley has to deal with their security because anything else would fail against all the Gadgeteers and Devisors of Whateley. Ping turned off the tracking, Scarlyt is going to be freaking out right about now. Rats, not even Ping can begin to trace who was tracking them. Thanks to Ping they now know someone is watching them, but they don't know who yet.
Great, she knows everything up until Ping cut her surveillance. And Scarlyt lies right to Sterling's face about a group project and no one has done their part of the project. Great, no official record of their trip, another strike against you when you get caught.
Blaming Tanya for not giving up on her friend, what made you so twisted, Scarlyt?
Uh, no, you deceived her, manipulated her, drugged her, and have kept her away from her friends, and erased memories of her existence from those who care about her. That is not willing at all. And claiming Sterling's power as yours to use as you please, you need a serious reality check.
The girl was hers, happily and willingly.
She plans on trying to kill Tanya with that darn knife, is it enchanted or something, I doubt it can pierce Tanya's PK field otherwise. She drugs Sterling once again to keep her knocked out so she won't see the vile acts she has planned, sickening.
Darn, having to only use Caro's side of the room while Zoo is gone, cramped is an understatement. Hey, costumed jewelry is cheap and easy to use for enchantments if you don't want it to last longer than a day or two at most. Half past four and already dark, I would need a flashlight to go out in the afternoon in wintertime there. Final binding time, and after what happened with the last big spell and the ring that Caro made I understand her caution.
200 yards covers most of the campus without trying too hard, dang, I always thought of Whateley as being at least a square mile in size. And this was the confidence boost Caro needed to work on her Magic Arts project again. Vic with his combat equipment, hip-flask holsters for a water belt, cool.
Sera, now is not the time and I'm getting tired of your attitude towards Vic. Good, the crystal has detected Sterling, now time to go in for the rescue. Sera going along, I only hope something happens that makes her able to finally see and realize Sterling exists.
Darn it! Scarlyt still has surveillance of Sera, her tagging along is going to make things complicated at best. And she can use her shadow-wielding powers like this, Scarlyt is a huge threat. Thinking of Sterling as a prize, you need to be locked up in a place and get counseling, kept safely away from others. Great, right as they spot Scarlyt disguised by shadows and Sterling the lights go out in the area, I hate that app!
You racist POS, I hope they put you in Doyle and you get locked up in Arkham for this, Scarlyt. Great, Sera has already forgotten about Scarlyt even though she is right there, I hate the no-see-uhm power in Scarlyt's hands. Sera is already down and out. Darn it, Avsel is down now, just what powers does Scarlyt have on hand right now?
Tanya fighting Scarlyt now and I knew her knife wouldn't get through Tanya's PK field. Refusing to talk, won't save you, Scarlyt. Knock-Out #5 is, a cheap shot in a fight, and she beats up Tanya to knock her out. Bad move, now Vic is pissed, he can see Scarlyt clearly and his eyes are glowing blue, she is screwed.
Water tendrils rip apart her shadow coverage, but she notes Vic's flask and sees them as a point of opportunity. Darn, she takes out the tendrils and then knocks out Vic with one punch. Pastel is healing Avsel only for Scarlyt to run over and use the last of her Knock-Out #5 on Avsel. Pastel's fingers have turned black, Scarlyt, you screwed up by underestimating the healer.
Scarlyt's left arm is limp and useless, even a Regen 5 will take some time to heal that. And Tanya is back up if a bit groggy. A call out to Sterling and Sterling begins to stir, recognizing Tanya's voice and also calling out for Scarlyt. *eyes go wide in shock* Noooo! Sterling can't die to Scarlyt, not after all this, not in such a way. Scarlyt can't just escape through the shadows and get away with this, it can't end like this.
Vic uses a ball of water on the wound with Pastel instructing him as they work to save Sterling's life. Pastel cusss out Scarlyt as she tries to heal Sterling's neck wound, please let her survive this and Scarlyt goes to jail for attempted murder. A call to Doyle, please let them make it here in time to save her. Everything is healing up right, but something keeps pulling Sterling away, we have to kill Scarlyt to save Sterling!
Dam it! It can't end this way, it just can't. Two cows to bleed off all the damage she healed, Pastel's form of healing is scary. Tanya is hurting and Sera, she will do that if you ask her that right now. Sera can finally see Sterling, but...is Sterling really gone for good? Please say no.
Good, Scarlyt didn't get Sterling's power. And now we know how she got those other permanent powers, why the school thought it was a good idea to let a multiple-time murderer attend is beyond me. Oh, you are angry. When they find out it was you, Scarlyt, you better pray security or one of the staff catches you and not Tanya, Vic, or one of her friends.
She killed Ike Sawyer aka Popgun, I wish the staff would figure out she has killed a fellow student already. She isn't even the real Jenifer Chalmers, but someone who killed her and took over her life, what kind of monster are we dealing with here? Destroying all evidence of Sterling ever being there, a call from Glam and she is planning a hook-up with someone else already, she needs to be stopped for good.
Tanya is in Doyle and can't even think of eating right now. Sterling lay in an infirmary bed, but no response, no reaction, nothing, this was the worst possible outcome. Vic is there with a warm drink and Dr. Gutierrez has news about Sterling. Physically she is fine, but no one is home, darn it!
So help me, Scarlyt, if you caused them not to be able to fully save Sterling I hope the truth comes out and you get what you deserve. Tanya the closest thing to family Sterling had, please let her come back to us before Christmas, let it be a Christmas miracle.
Pastel told me it felt like someone was interfering with the healing power, like a death curse or vampiric effect in action.
Saturday morning in Berlin, Scarlet enjoys a warm latte, and she is shopping for Raymond today. Wait, she sees Raymond walking away from her, this was Scarlyt's plan, she is luring her into a trap! She murdered Scarlet just to steal her powers, that psycho bitch needs to be put down like a rabid dog already. Harrison McDonough, so this is the person who Scarlyt really is, the person who murdered the real Jenifer and those other victims. Oh crap, I don't like his idea of an exit strategy, an anti-mutant bigot who somehow got stuck in the body of a mutant he killed and he just keeps killing.
One Bloody Epilogue
This story started off so happy, Tanya was going to go home to see her family for Thanksgiving. But then her father got hurt trying to protect others from a psycho with a blaster rifle and she rushed home to see him. She had a fun time with her cousin, but that was over far too soon.
Sterling being alone, her past, and the pain she suffered through thanks to her family and her own power that manifested to save her from their schemes to use her. To see her reach out for help, for a friend who would help her and comfort her only to be manipulated and groomed by someone who only wanted her as a plaything and for her power. And how things ended, right now I just hope a miracle happens and Sterling comes back to them.
Scarlyt is a monster, I thought she was a victim because of her past and the minor glimpses we got, someone who was broken and hurt when she manifested. But the more we saw of her it proved that wrong, or showed that didn't matter as she was treating Sterling as bad or worse than I suspected she had been. Then this last part, everything she did to Sterling, the attempt to murder her just to steal her power. Then that kick in the gut last part reveals who Scarlyt really is. This is why I wish Fubar was around, Scarlyt is a monster and Harrison McDonough needs to be stopped before he kills again.
Please say there are happier times ahead for Tanya and that Sterling will be back in the future and not stuck in Doyle basically comatose.
Thank You for the story comments appreciated and help me know they are being read and liked. Note: My story comments can't nor are trying to replace reading the stories, simply my way of enjoying them and letting the authors know I enjoy them.
2) As for Scarlyt's personal history, the school does not know. No one knows. She's assumed the tragic backstory of her first victim so completely that even she has trouble keeping her brain straight half the time. Between the emotional and physical trauma in her file, it's taken for granted that she gives telepathic scanners raging headaches, and the administration's taken her act at face value. Everyone can see that she's broken, but they have no idea how much.
I'd ask if you'd like to read her origin story, "A Study in Scarlyt," but I think we've had enough tragedy for the present. I don't often try to write thoroughly evil characters, but...
- The Classrooms - Story Feedback
- Kirby Hall - The Second Generation
- Turkey Day Tragedy by Wasamon